Thursday, October 15, 2009

Missing my Angels-always

Today is a day of remembrance for all that have lost a precious baby. A group I never imagined I would be apart of and a group that will always hold a place in my heart, because I understand the pain. http://www.october15th.com/ There are layers to this group and and types of pain I will never understand. Warrior Mommies and Daddies who have fought to get through the grief and who have immeasurable courage. Still Birth, late term losses, new born loss due to defects, SIDS and the list goes on and on! Today I lift each and everyone of you up in prayer. We alter our dreams after these losses and search for renewed hope! I hope you have found yours!

Friday, October 9, 2009

Anyone out there? Restless


I keep seeing my counter go up, anyone out there? Perhaps it is just from me opening this blog with good intentions on updating. Seems all the little things get in the way. You know-poopy diapers, kids fighting, runny noses, my daughter urgent need to change her clothes 5 times within 5 minutes, and never mind her changing hair styles too. 5 going on 15 I tell you! Just the daily grind I suppose.

So here is my burning question for those mystery hits on my counter. Anyone else out there get to a place where they should feel content and yet they are still restless. What is that? I thought after my family was complete (especially after the miscarriage journey), that I too would feel complete. I have waves of that feeling. Mostly when I look at the big picture of our future, yet I still have this crazy restless feeling that I can't shake. So what is missing, what changes do I think need to be made, what is it I am searching for??? Can't really put my finger on it yet. Maybe I just need to empty some cabinets out, do some nesting, and get organized. Perhaps that will for now fill this restless feeling? Perhaps it is really just natural to NEVER be totally content. We are by nature suppose to dream, wish and hope. Leaving us to just be restless. Thoughts?